I hate facebook. I wish it had never been created. I hate knowing i can look up people and see what they are up to or who they talk to or what they do with their lives and yeah its personal punishment going through all their stuff but its because its so easy. It leaves you feeling really distant though. There are people you used to share everything with that now you cant even write a ‘hello’ too. There are people you delete but if you type in their name… chances are good you can still go through all their shit.

Why do i do this to myself? Because in the past few years i have left behind and recreated my life a few times, and although of each setting i had, i still talk to one or two of those people.. there are so many who no longer have an interest in knowing me. My fault of course since i ditched them to do other stuff. But still. At the end of the day.. when you only have a few friends.. and your a bit down and all the people online are people you dont chat too and the ones you do talk to have too much other stuff going on to pay you attention… well you kind of wish you had a really close knit group of friends, who you can call up, and spend time and reminisce about the old days with.

Every time i feel that sadness, that lonely separation i get so down, that i want to just move again, and just say fuck this shit to all the people who have done nothing wrong and are just living their own lives… and go meet new people, and have adventures and somehow prove a point… that if you can all move on and upwards… i can show you that whatever im doing is somehow more fun and exciting and different.

This kind of mind frame is probably WHY i find myself in this predicament.

I spent the past week with my Aunty. It was really good to see her. She always offers nothing but encouragement for whatever i want to do with myself and is someone i find i can talk to about stuff that really weighs me down. I think i should talk to her more often, we let too much time go between our catch ups. It was stupid though because mum doesnt like us chatting because she thinks my aunt will encourage me too much and i’ll never move home or whatever. Thing is though, even if i move back to Australia.. i dont want to live on the sunshine coast and work for my dad like my sister does. it would be so depressing, and no wonder my sister IS so depressed. ive been here for almost a month now and im going crazy with the absolute lack of anything to do. I would come live here if i wanted to raise a family or something cos it is a nice place and i’d want to be near mum, but until then.. this isnt my life.

my mouth is in pain, and im trying to find space from the constant loudness of the house, and im counting the days until i go back to england. Although i do wonder.. if because ive been gone two months.. and my mind frame has changed a bit.. or more, i have remembered myself and regained some of what i had lost along the road… i think i might not be the same anymore. i cant slot back into the same routine as when i left because i was pretty depressed at that point.. and now i want to do more.. see more.. have an adventure and go places. I guess we will just have to wait and see what it all turns out like. I wonder where i will be this time next year.

‘And I wonder if I ever cross your mind
For me it happens all the time

And I don’t know how I can do without
I just need you now’

x

• Everyone has times of not being able to get along with their families. Today was a fairly typical day in my household. It went like this. Dad gets up with Kelsey and Blake. I get up. Kids get ready for school. Washing gets done. Cleaning up kitchen from breakfast chaos done. Kelsey nap, Imogen constant feed. Mum goes crazy cos she wants to leave the house. Go pick up kids from school. Start dinner. Babies to bed. Kids to bed. Grown ups chatting time. Bed.At some point in this my mum loses her temper, starts yelling at dad/closest child. Dad yells at me/says i dont help enough. Kids get yelled at. Kelsey cries. Everyone loses it. Its a nightmare.I’ve realised… i never say a word when mum goes off her head. And i mean she proper goes off, she calls everyone the worst names you could think of, throws stuff, slams doors, smacks kids etc etc. Its clearly just anger at feeling trapped and her emotional outlet comes in bursts of rage but when she is being this way the whole house is so affected in the following ways…

1. Mum starts yelling.
2. Dad will lose it. Start shouting.
3. Genie starts texting her friends, blaming Blake for not cleaning.
4. Blake walks around silent but with a face like thunder.
5. Kelsey cries and follows mum around saying sorry.
6. I silently start cleaning/dinner/bathing children etc..
7. Thats how it goes. Its really shit sometimes.

• I dislike people who get into moods and tantrums instantly just because something isnt going their way. I’ve really realised that i cant deal with it as much these days. Its not fair on anyone else when one person gets moody and pissy for no good reason. Just because they can and know you will react by caring/doing what they want/ paying extra attention. Stupid.

• New topic! There was a wasp situation in the house today. WASPS. yuck.

• On another note. Everyone in the shops today thought Imogen was my baby. Now i can understand this since she is only 8 days old and i was holding her (although DEVASTATED that i look like i just had a child) but i draw the line when people see Kelsey and say ‘oh is she yours too?’… No. No she isnt. Thanks.

• Different subject. This is gonna sound stupid but i am really bad at communicating when i feel like its a chore. I am more then happy to sit online chatting and sending update emails on life in general etc.. but i cant stand it when i send an email and get the reply that its not personal enough, im not trying enough, i clearly dont care and its unfair on other person. It makes me feel like im pressured to write a super nice, in depth email about my thoughts, feelings, dreams etc. Well you know what? I dont want to talk about my deepest feelings every day, or to be all emotional in every word i write. I am fairly tired/busy and a bit stretched for time some days and i would like to just be able to send a normal email, have a bit of a laugh, get an update etc, and not be criticised for it. Thanks.
• Its my own fault im feeling that way, i know it is. I know how it feels to be on that end of it and you just want to know whats happening in someones head, and they hardly tell you, they just say funny things that happened that day. But i just dont want to feel like i HAVE to write a certain way.

• My head is all muddled. So many thoughts. Everything is just getting on my nerves and im tired. Im going to bed now. I really would like to see myself in 5 years just to see how everything turns out. I’ll hopefully be living on a cruise ship, working as a tech, only making contact with land every few months.I’ll be alone, not overweight but probably an alcoholic. Lets face it. Thats my dream.

• God. I am a really bad person. Like really. I always tell myself i’ve changed. But lets face it. It appears i haven’t.

Goodnight.

Its been a whole year pretty much since i came on here. I dont expect anyone i know will still be reading this but thats ok i kinda need to just write down all my thoughts anyway.

I seem to have come full circle. I’m back in Australia after being gone a year in London. Its been an intense year. I have as usual got myself into so many different random situations and events and looking back is hard.

Things that have changed:

• My mum had a baby two days ago, a little girl called Imogen (that makes six children).
  
• I have a house and a job and friends in London.
• I finished Uni.
• I turned 21.
• I came to terms with the fact that life doesnt turn out as amazing as you planned

Things that havent changed:

• My hair.
• My driving ability.
• My lack of ability to communicate my issues.
• My lack of stressing/getting worked up about things.
• My lack of caring.

So… Being back home is really strange. I’ve had trouble keeping in regular contact with my family because as usual life got too hectic and i got neglectful and now i dont talk to them about anything thats stressing me and they are pressuring me and going on at me to stay in Aus and work for dad and be more family orientated etc. Which is lovely on one hand but fucking shits me off on the other because i wish they would just let me do the whole ‘go travel and live somewhere else thing’ without taking it as a massive personal attack on them. Alot of people my age do the travel thing, its only hard because i have got a very young family, my older sister works for dad and keeps the parents happy so im the only one whose ruining the family unit by pissing off.

Everything is so different now. Last time i was on here, i was with Jen. Who is fantastically happy now with her gf and they are moving in together and it all sounds really lovely. I now have a gf called Erin, who i live with and have been with awhile. We have our ups and downs, she is a lot different to anyone else i have ever dated but not necessarily in a bad way, she just runs her emotions a lot higher to the surface then most people.

I have done loads of different jobs and met so many people. Its been a whole different world. Its been cold, and tiring, and funny, and random and i have really enjoyed some parts and hated others. But all in all i think it went ok so far. I am actually really looking forward to going back. Not to my job cos its boring but to the life in general.

I feel like i miss my family alot when im over there. But now that im here i realise that family doesnt really change, i still bicker with my siblings, i still feel annoyed when my parents ask me to do stuff like feed the dogs and i still feel really normal when im around them.

I havent kept in touch very well with my friends since ive been gone but thats once again due to me being slack, lack of internet etc and has resulted in all my friends now being in England and not many left here. In fact i have one English friend Heather Fleetwood Mac who i absolutely adore because she is hilarious and amazing, and so nice that she lent me her spare laptop to use when i came here, its nice to have one of those people who you can really get along with so well and its not effort.. So yeah i’ve made a best friend or two and i have Erin and my house and things are ok.

I guess i just always expect so much from my situations and from people and where i saw myself by now. I had hoped i would have a steady career set up, and be financially secure and mentally in some way more mature but i do feel alot as if im just trudging along day by day, trying to make ends meet, trying to be really cool and relaxed about all my situations and i have no idea what i want to do next. I could always go back to studying and get a degree in something random. If nothing else students always have fun and apart from figuring out how to pay rent it would be an interesting solution. Or i should just grow up, get a real job and sort myself out so my parents dont keep telling me how much of a dissapointment i am and how much my life hasnt achieved anything yet.

I just dont know where to head future wise. I wish someone would just sit me down and show me a schedule of my life for the next ten years and then i would be content. Its more the uncertainty of what would happen if i stayed here, if l changed jobs, if i moved etc etc and i just want everything to be done already.

Im so tired now. Im looking after Kelsey at the moment and shes gonna want to get up for her 1am feed and i wont even have gone to sleep yet. I spend so much time worried about disappointing people, about upsetting Erin or my mum or my siblings and at the same time i wish all these issues would just leave me alone, that someone would want to chat to me without having a massive drama that im somehow involved in and that i dont need to communicate some sort of feeling or opinion about or that someone would just understand me, and know me enough to not push me or stress me out or make me feel obligated to do something that one half of my life would like, but the other wouldnt. Because its really hard already just trying to deal. I guess its my own fault for putting myself in this situation. My family on the one side of the world. My life on the other. Now i have to juggle it and talk everyone around all day when all i actually want to do is sit quietly, with some sort of alcoholic beverage, and possibly a cigarette, and a friend to just make me laugh and forget for a second how stressed i am.

I guess i just look back on what i was like last time i wrote on here. I had hope and excitement and goals and i thought i was awesome, untouchable, unique. Now i think im a bit useless, fairly average, and have no interesting future, no amazing life, just daily struggle… And the thought of facing every day the work, the domestic arguments, the sadness of being so lonely, so isolated like i’ve been for quite some time now, it just makes me even more tired.

I guess i’ve got to that point of the night where im giving up. So i’m gonna go now, fall asleep so i dont have to think and then start again tomorrow. Its not always the end of the world, i have a new baby sister to see tomorrow. Goodnight to my little diary. Maybe i’ll blog again.

x

(I got to like a whole lot more music since i’ve been gone btw. Current favorites are Kooks, XX, Mystery Jets, Alphabeat, Jose Gonzalez, Laura Marling etc etc. Songs i am listening to during this blog…. Run – Snow Patrol, and, Sometime Around Midnight – Airborne Toxic Event.)

I am on the coast till tomorrow, then in about 5 days i am leaving for London..

Shit just got real.

I am suddenly quickly running out of time and i feel like i haven’t organised anything.. I mean, i have somewhere to stay for the first two weeks, i have my plane ticket and passport, some basic clothes.. i may need some more and i need some stuff like a bag to put my bathroom shit in, some new black pants, a black button up shirt, and maybe a dress… i really want a nice dress.. but other then that i think im just gonna take some clothes, some money, and see how i go

I will hopefully get some clothes over there, go to some nice places..etc.

Right now i am really quickly realising how little time i actually have.. when i think about it i get that quiet tightening of the chest feeling you get when your are about to stress, i havent actually let myself stress out but i’m expecting one panic attack to hit in the next four days, probably when i’m packing or have to change money or something.

So basically that’s all that’s going on, i have been on the coast for two weeks looking after Kelsey, doing laundry and making dinner for the family while mum is away… I am so glad i am finished this business tomorrow…

I am having going away drinks this Sunday night, should be fun and its going to be interesting because a whole bunch of people i have never put in the same room will be coming together.. it’s either gonna get awkward or be ok.. I’m hoping for the ‘be ok’…

I havent really lost any weight, maybe a tiny bit because i havent left the house so had no opportunity to eat crap, but dad and i enjoy two or so quiet jim beam and cokes each night.. so that hasnt helped..

Ummmm what else? I still get to have my head shot taken for our end of year showcase/grad we have at the theatre… my headshot is getting taken at 10am the morning i leave for London so i am expecting either a super excited or super stressed picture to be had…

I am not sure what else to say, i am feeling ok with the packing thing, because all my stuff is still at my house but there isn’t much rubbish around and i cleared out under the bed, all my drawers, the cupboard etc.. i also removed any ‘naughty’ things i had in my possesion in case it’s family members who have to pack my furniture away when i don’t come back… yes i know it doesnt make sense to leave everything there and not pack but mum is still expecting me to return so i can’t really put all my stuff in storage without her being annoyed…

I am really looking forward to going away… It is going to be such an adventure. Ok i have nothing else to say.. i am feeling a little frazzled right now and i am sick to death of bickering kids, screaming babies, doing laundry for four people a day, cooking dinner etc… And i am just looking forward to being young again.. I am not ready to be a mum…

I am sorry that this blog is not in any order, has bad punctuation, is not really about anything… etc… but there is a screaming baby that i just cannot handle right now so i am officially over it..

London here i come..

This is the way you left me, I’m not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it’s forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together.

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life, Can’t get no love without sacrifice. If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well. A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell.

This is the hardest story that I’ve ever told. No hope, or love, or glory .Happy endings gone forever more I feel as if I’m wasted. And I’m wastin’ every day

This is the way you left me, I’m not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it’s forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together.

2 o’clock in the morning, something’s on my mind. Can’t get no rest; keep walkin’ around If I pretend that nothin’ ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep I can think that we just carried on

This is the hardest story that I’ve ever told No hope, or love, or glory Happy endings gone forever more I feel as if I’m wasted And I’m wastin’ every day

This is the way you left me, I’m not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending. This is the way that we love, Like it’s forever. Then live the rest of our life, But not together.

A Little bit of love, little bit of love Little bit of love, little bit of love

I feel as if I’m wasted And I waste everyday This is the way you left me, I’m not pretending. No hope, no love, no glory, No Happy Ending.

This is the way that we love, Like it’s forever. To live the rest of our life, But not together.

I know i’m the one leaving but this is how it feels… Right now Jen is fast asleep in my bed and i think i might cry. I know its all my own choice but it sure as hell isn’t easy.

Goddamn it.

This weekend just past i worked at Splendour. I am now going to list the events of what happened.

I got home from Cats on Thursday night, about 11.30 and was already so tired, but had to pack for Splendour which i only finished doing at about 1.30 in the morning. I got up at 7.30 to pack the car with Jon, then went and had breakfast at uni, met up with Jon and Annie at 11.30 and we drove down to Byron. We got there in the afternoon, figured out where we were camping and went and set up. We then looked around a bit and Jon had to work at like 6pm.

It started pissing down rain when Jon had to go to work and we were cold so Annie and I confined ourselves to our tents, I read a book till about 9pm and then tried to get some sleep. It was pouring, I was freezing, The ground was hard and cold, people were yelling and fireworks going off… So barely any sleep had on Friday night.

We got up at 7am on Saturday, had nutella toast and got dressed and went to our work meeting/ debrief at 9am. Started work at 10am on the Mix Up stage, looking for fires, letting bands on and off (every time i checked their access pass they seemed so offended, like i should know who they are…i didn’t..) and telling important people and other bands they weren’t allowed into the viewing area on the stage because we could only safely have 25 or that section would fall down.. structural limits and capacites and shit. This did not make Annie or I popular with a lot of diva like artists. So we started at 10am and in the afternoon each got a short 20 minute or so break, which i used to run back to my tent and get my big warm jacket. The day continued, there was no sitting down or leaning against anything allowed because we had to look ‘professional’ and gum boots are not friends to your feet for a lot of standing. Once it got dark it was a bit more dramatic with all the calls we heard over our headsets of people passed out, overdosing in the toilets, throwing up and falling down, jumping the fences and running, stealing stuff, being crushed in our mosh pit, and generally showing off every aspect of human stupidity. My favorite for the evening though… when a guy came up the stage stairs to me and said ‘there is two people having sex out the back’… Ok so firstly i wondered how the patrons had gotten through the fence to our restricted area, and secondly.. what the hell were they doing that there for in plain site and in the area where every security and police patrol is walking through.. But anyway sure enough i looked out the back near the excess equipment and on the ground is two drunk people quite unaware everyone could see them, there were legs in the air and serious motion going on, it was terrible. So i went and got Dan our security supervisor and pretty much personal body guard and he came round, walked over and told them to get up, which they did awkwardly and he marched them back through the fence.. the classy girl picked up her undies and walked through with them in her hand, laughing and pulling her tiny skirt down. Disgusting…but it was also a little funny.

So our main band for the night was Midnight Juggernauts, then another band or two played after that, which meant we finished at about 1am that night, got back to sign off, walked back to our tent and Annie and I just crashed in our tents straight away, i slept until 7.30 in the morning without waking up once or feeling cold or uncomfortable or anything.

So Annie went to shower, and she had to wait forever because the lines were huge. I was feeling pretty grubby but due to the extreme cold, my lack of thongs and not much time to wait in a line.. Jon emptied a bottle of water into a pot, heated it up, and i used it to wash my hair behind my tent. Dirty appearance… fixed.

Ok so we started at 10am again, this time i was doing the same job except i was asked to also walk around the stage through the crowds and check people for fires, smoking in the mosh pit, people passed out against the fence etc. I continued circling all day, asking people if they needed a medic, could they stand up, had they taken anything.. all the fun questions you ask bleary eyed drunk and drugged up idiots lying on the ground. At 5pm i got 15minutes to eat and sit, which i used to eat a bag of little biscuits and drink a V, then i was back to it, going up on stage to help Annie with the 25 people limit again, walking around the crowds getting water to girls and guys on the ground, stopping any sort of ‘lets make a fire’ fun ideas anyone had in the cold.. etc. When 9pm came and Hilltop Hoods started to play i slipped back through the fence because there was no way i was going to be in the festival grounds with that huge crowd, so i went back up on stage and stood yelling to people they couldnt come in with Annie and then once the band finished i went back out and checked the new set of ‘about to pass out’ people were still breathing. By this stage my feet were actually so sore from the hard ground and lack of sitting that i was nearly having trouble walking. At 10.30pm Annie and I were allowed to walk back to Sign On. We got back to our tent at about quarter to 11 and Jon informed us we couldnt get the car out till midnight and he was going to sleep for half an hour more before we packed up and drove back. Annie and i sorted most of our stuff to the outside of our tents, i sat in mine waiting for midnight to come and chatting, because it was cold and our bodies were cooling down from lack of moving, our leg muscles were twitching and our feet were cramping. At 11.45pm i told Annie i wasnt going to sleep but i was lying down to rest my feet… I woke up 20 minutes later, Jon had got the car and we were packing.. i hadnt heard a thing cos i had just been dead to the world for that time. We packed up and drove out the gate at 1am, got back home at 3am, showered and got organised and i fell asleep after 4am. I have just woken up and my body is aching and reminding me it has eaten hardly anything, done too much standing and walking, and my feet never want to be stood on again.

All in all though.. even though it may not seem it… it was actually really quite fun because we got to be on stage, met all these bands and got to laugh and look down on all the idiots around the place. The long hours were good because we had nothing to do at our tent anyway and apart from the extreme physically exhaustion and the cold it all went quite well. Plus.. i got paid to watch and meet all those bands and when i was walking around the crowds i had friendly but giant and tough security watching  so i was never in any danger. Also i met and made friends with some cool audio guys and i had a good time.

I would never go to Splendour unless i was being paid, i certainly wouldnt pay to go there… The bands and the markets and everything are really good, there is plenty of camping ground and stuff to do.. but the crowds are too huge and there is too many stupid people doing even stupider things and anyone who could get close enough to see their favorite bands ended up getting quite crushed.. plus the cold anf rain and mud hindered everything and at night, if i wasnt a member of the event and security team, having security assistance near me and available in a second if i used my radio, then i would of worried about my safety. Luckily though there was no major drama and every time some drunk idiot guys started hassling me i was back over the barrier and in front of the stage with the guards before they could trouble me.

Ok thats all now.

The End.

Ok so Update:

I have booked and paid for my tickets to London, I leave on the 19th of August, start working on Dirty Dancing on the 24th of August and if i dislike it and don’t get a job then i have a return ticket for the 20th of September. If i do get a job or love it then i will just change the date of that return to much later time.

Its a bittersweet time. I am so excited, like unbelievably because i have always wanted to do this and have been working towards this for so long. But it is the end of many things if i get a job there and thats going to be really tough. But i guess this is just something i have to do, it feels so necessary. I have always wanted to go and right now i am unhappy with my job situation and this is a chance of a lifetime. Working on Dirty Dancing is going to be amazing.

So i have about a week and a half with not much to do right now, then on the 20th of July i start a show at La Boite, then i go work on Splendour, then i go back to the La Boite show, then i go to the Sunshine Coast to look after Kelsey for two weeks whilst mum is away (getting paid for it woot) and then 4 days later i fly to London. Busy Busy.

Jen and I have had a long talk. Right now we are just enjoying all the time we have together. Its running out too soon. I don’t know if i will be ready when the time to say goodbye comes. But this is something i have to do alone and as much as its a sad decision and its purely based on circumstances and has nothing to do with how much i love Jen or how perfect we are together… it is something i have planned for 3 years and i just have to do it and i have to do it by myself. It isnt fair for me to be hoping i get a job and figuring out how to stay in London, with Jen waiting here to see if i come back, to organise what she wants to do around it, it’s just unfair on her. Plus i want to say goodbye in person and not over the phone if i dont come back.

Anyway thats all i have to say on that. I currently have a stomach ache, i reckon i got food poisoning at work today. I am working at Suncorp Stadium tomorrow and i think it will be so boring. But yay for more money, cos i am relying a fair bit on my parents for money for London.

Ok then,

Night All

xxx

I love you Jen.

I love you because you lean over to hug me on the couch all the time.

I love you because your always pinching my arm.

I love you because you make me laugh.

I love you because your always pretty even when you have a cold.

I love you because you like cleaning and accept i hate it.

I love you because we both like chocolate so much.

I love you because of our mutual love of yogos with choc chip.

I love you because cooking for you makes me happy.

I love you because you will make me nachos when im tired when i know you hate cooking.

I love you because you fall asleep on me on the couch.

I love you because half your shit is scattered round my house.

I love you because we both like young adult fiction.

I love you because you share your nice smelling skin cream stuff.

I love you because i try to remember to hang up the bath mat.

I love you because it feels so right and comfortable to be with you.

I love you because making you happy is what makes me happy.

I love you because you snore, grind your teeth and cling to me when i am trying to sleep.

I love you because your always asleep before me but wake up when i move.

I love you because you always ask ‘what’s wrong?’ when i even move slightly, no matter what we are doing or where we are.

I love you because i love hearing ‘it pleases me greatly’ all the time.

I love you because you buy neat stickers and stamps and let me do arts and crafts stuff that you know i will also find fun.

I love you because you say that some stuff is ‘only funny when you do it’.

I love you because of the noise you make when you pretend to headbutt me.

I love you because you know ignoring me will put an end to my tantrums or attempt to annoy you.

I love you because you know we are ‘even’ if i have one more bar of chocolate then you do and that our shampoo is ‘mine’ because i said so.

I love you because you buy weird clothes and accessories and make them cool.

I love you because you sew things and make stuff look cooler by adding a little touch of you to it.

I love you because you smell wonderful.

I love you because you squeal over any animal you see, especially pugs.

I love you because you always offer to get me stuff.

I love you because you make me feel like i am the most awesome person you know.

I love you because you love me too.

I love you because i want to… not because i have to.

You are perfect to me and for me.

Love.

xxxx

]]> http://randomjodie.wordpress.com/2009/06/10/how-beautiful-you-really-are-to-me/feed/ 4 randomjodie http://randomjodie.wordpress.com/2009/05/26/glommen-time/ http://randomjodie.wordpress.com/2009/05/26/glommen-time/#comments Tue, 26 May 2009 13:49:27 +0000 randomjodie http://randomjodie.wordpress.com/?p=50 ]]> I watched a show tonight called Golden Age tonight. It was ok… very long.. it went from 7.30 till 10.15 and i was like.. oh god my ass is numb. But yeh it was a pretty good story, very physical and a tragic story but generally ok.

I spent most of my day today retyping three scripts so they all matched in format, size etc.. it was irritating.

I have nothing interest to say lately, i went with Jen and saw Yo Gabba Gabba which kinda rocked my socks.  I also got her to watch Transformers which hello…awesome…

Jen is still wonderful as usual, she is so perfect to be around. We are so comfy together. I love having her around and we make our timetables fit pretty well. I get her a couple of nights a week so yay. I am currently watching wedding crashers and its such a funny movie.

I have a feeling im sposed to be busy tomorrow but i forget what i am supposed to be doing.. hmmm.. oh well..

I got new boots, they are awesome. I am still wanting a new jacket but the boots came first and the jacket will have to wait.

I am considering going to bed just because im bored.

Oh well i apologise for this post being really boring but not muxh has been happening.

Night All,

xx